All Souls

Forgiven Forever

Today is All Souls day at church, but I won’t be able to attend.  Instead, I am going to a private gathering in honor of my friend, Kitt’s memory.  Several of us who took the road less traveled through Kitt’s guidance will celebrate what he meant to us:

Robert Frost (1874–1963). Mountain Interval. 1920.

1. The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth; 5

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same, 10

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back. 15

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference. 20

2003-06-28 015 Birthday Bash

Kitt’s BBQ Birthday Bash, 2003

Many of us have not seen each other in many years, but most of us have kept in touch via Facebook, with sporadic get-togethers over  the span of time.  I regret missing church today, because it is the new path I’m cautiously treading.  Here is one of the readings for today:

Reading 2 rom 5:5-11

Brothers and sisters:
Hope does not disappoint,
because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts
through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.
For Christ, while we were still helpless,
died at the appointed time for the ungodly.
Indeed, only with difficulty does one die for a just person,
though perhaps for a good person
one might even find courage to die.
But God proves his love for us
in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us.
How much more then, since we are now justified by his Blood,
will we be saved through him from the wrath.
Indeed, if, while we were enemies,
we were reconciled to God through the death of his Son,
how much more, once reconciled,
will we be saved by his life.
Not only that,
but we also boast of God through our Lord Jesus Christ,
through whom we have now received reconciliation.

Yes, this is the Christian hope, but it is the hope of all of us who turn to our Higher Power, be it Buddha, Allah, Krishna, the Celtic gods, or whatever. Hope does not disappoint, and we strive in a clamorous world with our individual hurts to find the promised reconciliation.

I was thinking of my mother tonight.  She made many bad and unwise choices, and I’m not 100% sure if I would call her s psychopath.  I do know that her choices had a hugely harmful impact on my life.  Some of them, I have posted about.  Others remain to be written about in front of my keyboard for my own healing and understanding.  She said, “I did the best I could,” but she never said, “I’m sorry.”  Yet after we had our moment of confrontation, and she denied everything, and still refused responsibility or reconciliation, and continued in her same destructive behavior, I forgave her long, long ago.  I separated myself from her down to the very end for my own survival, and when I re-established minimal contact with her near the end, she still had not changed.  I stand strong with my forgiveness though, because I believe she was honest in saying, “I did the best I could.”  Forgiven, but not forgotten, still weighed down by the damage that was done, but taking responsibility for my own choices now, and moving forward.  I hope she is resting in peace, knowing that the hard lessons were valuable in that they brought me to where I am, and that I’m grateful for the good that came with the overriding bad.

My mom sang this song.  She didn’t sing it to ME, but she did sing it.  I could imagine for a few brief moments that she meant it for me while she sang. so I play it tonight in memory of my mom.  It’s a great song to sing for someone you really love, so sing it today for someone you love:

If I could carry a tune, I’d sing it for the guys I’ll see later today because we have shared the journey of a lifetime.

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About DogDharma

Dog Dharma is written by a human who loves dogs and who believes dogs have attained enlightenment. The human behind Dog Dharma came from humble origins, has faced many trials, enjoyed many adventures, and taken a path less traveled. He claims no special privilege or expertise, and remains humble. Dog Dharma‘s author has learned a few things along the way, and has much yet to learn. He has been told by many people that he has a talent for writing, and aspires to write a book, but is a little too lazy and disorganized, so his blog will suffice for now. He opens a window into his life in the hope that some of his words may be of comfort, some may be a beacon or warning, and perhaps he will connect with like-minded souls. Everything shared comes from a place of openness and honesty, but with no claim that he possesses the Truth. People and places mentioned should be taken as pseudonyms. In many cases, details may be an amalgamation of actual events disguised to protect the “innocent.” Nothing written is to be taken as actual fact, but as the author of Dharma Dog‘s limited understanding. From the mouths of the Beatles: In the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make
This entry was posted in All Souls, forgiven, forgiven but not forgotten, friendship, Kitt Kling, mom, mother, reconciliation, you are my sunshine and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to All Souls

  1. I always liked that song. I’ll be with you in spirit at Kitt’s gathering. Have a blessed day.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. mandy says:

    This was a beautiful version of You Are My Sunshine. My mother sang it a lot. (Not to me either.) Also she sang Ain’t Nothin But A Houndog (Elvis). I sang them both when I was crossing patrol guard at school in 5th grade. That was the year I dreamed I’d be a famous singer.
    I know, what does this have to do with anything? Nothing really. But your thoughts prompted those memories– I loved listening to the song and I imagined Kitt feeling the love you all shared at your gathering for him. Wishing you much peace⭐️

    Liked by 1 person

  3. DogDharma says:

    Mandy, my mom (thankfully) didn’t sing “You Ain’t Nothin’ But a Hounddog” but she did have Elvis’s album, and I played the song over and over because I thought it was a song about dogs of the canine variety!

    This reminds me of the other song she used to sing (not to me), “Let Me Call You Sweetheart.” There was a version of the song from the Model-T era with alternate lyrics called “Let Me Call You Lizzie.” I wish I could remember the lyrics. It went something like:

    Let me call you Lizzie
    I’m in debt for you
    Keep your headlights burning
    And your taillights, too…

    Thank you, it was a nice gathering, but we were all a little too stunned and raw.

    Like

    • mandy says:

      That is really funny that you thought the Hound Dog song was about dogs 🙂 The “Let Me Call You Lizzie” is a good one, too!

      I can imagine how difficult the gathering was, it’s been such a short time since Kitt passed away. It will take time to even process, I’m sure. He certainly made a difference . . .I really like the photo of you and him at his birthday. It’s very sweet. Now you’ll continue to carry his torch. ♥

      Like

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