Marriage — A Retropective in Pictures

There are a lot of photographs I could share, but I have chosen for now to not include any photographs of the children or any “compromising” pictures, except for the following:

Rebecca - I Love You Daddy

This is one that Paula sent to me in the spring of 2013, while she was busy trying to convince me to return to the UK, yet unbeknownst to me, courting Claire.  It speaks volumes about how the kids felt about me, and I loved them very much.

Terry and Paula at Shoreham Harbor 3

Apologies that the above photo is so tiny.  It was the first photograph ever taken of me and Paula together.  We were sitting on a bench at the Shoreham-by-Sea beach in October 2009.

Shoreham-by-Sea Beach Paula Claire

The above is a picture of the sea itself, and one reason why I was so taken by England.  What a delight to be living in a place where a short 10 – 15 minute walk could have me watching the foam lap on the rocky shore.

The next group of pictures were all taken during the month of July 2010, before and after we were married on the 20th.  Paula had arrived on the 3rd, and so my friends wanted to treat her to true American-style 4th of July.  I treated her to tours of my little town, Greenbelt.  I treated her to meals at Chevy’s, Johnny Rocket’s, and several other restaurants.  We went to the upscale shopping district in Friendship Heights, visited many of the national monuments and museums, stopped to have a look at the White House, and wandered the National Zoo.  And we had some “alone time” — you’ll glimpse a bit of the teddy bear tattoo Paula had gotten very soon after we met so that I would “always be close to her heart.”

The couple of photos of Paula and I in bed are worth noting.  To prepare for her visit, I’d gone out and bought craft paper, and spent hours using marking pens, water color paint, glue and glitter to make banners welcoming her to my home.  I even wrote her a love letter on one sheet that was probably 3 ft x 4 ft, telling her how much I loved her, and how I looked forward to our future.  She has probably burned the posters by now, even though they came from the heart.


IMG_0351 IMG_0352 IMG_0353 IMG_0355 IMG_0357 IMG_0362 IMG_0363 James Kitt Paula - 2010-07-04 - 002 James Kitt Paula - 2010-07-04 - 003 Johnny Rocket's - Terry & Paula Paula and Rob - Chevy's - 02 Paula at Lincoln Memorial - 03 Paula in Front of Lincoln Memorial Paula in Front of White House - 01 Paula in Front of White House - 02 Paula in Johnny Rocket's Paula Near Lincoln Memorial Talking with Nikki Teddy and Paula - 2010-07-04 Terry and Paula 001 Terry and Paula at Lincoln Memorial - 01 Terry and Paula at Lincoln Memorial - 02 IMG_0356 Kitt's Wedding Gift Paula - 2010-07-04 - 002 Paula and Rob - Chevy's - 01 Terry and Paula 003 Terry and Paula 009 Terry and Paula 010 Terry and Paula 011 Terry and Paula 012 Terry and Paula 070 Terry and Paula in Friendship Heights Wedding - 03 Wedding - 17

The last photograph is a gift my friend had given us, hand-crafting the box.  The box contained DVDs of our marriage, in both US and UK format.  Here’s our wedding ceremony:



Sad to say, but the following photographs are not in chronological order, but were all taken after we were married.  Some were captured before I learned the truth about Paula not owning her home, and hence, were on trips I made to the UK before finally being able to move there.  Others were taken after I moved to the UK in July 2011, one year after we were married.

The first two were from a rare night out in which we had a lovely dinner at Aberdeen Steak House in Brighton.  The third photo is from Christmas 2011, opening a gift — still didn’t know the truth.  Further down, there are more pictures from that Christmas.

There’s a great photo of Paula at gay pride in Brighton with the pink hat, which would have been August 2011, the month after we were married.

Then there’s a photo of me and Paula at Abbey Road, and a few others further below.  That would have been on our trip to London in fall of 2010.

There are some pictures of our trip to Wales in October of 2010, which is when I learned that my dear friend Meg has died in childbirth.

Paula painting our bedroom…  A color we had chosen together after a session with the marriage counselor.  I could not do the painting because I couldn’t see well enough to catch the drips or notice the spots that needed a second coat.  I particularly like the picture of her holding up the paint roller.

The London shots include our meal at McDonald’s and a free visit to a museum that had to do with the motion picture industry.

There are a few photos that Paula took of herself using her videocam, and a couple of random shots I took of Paula just because I thought she was beautiful.

You’ll notice a few photos of me.  Two were taken on one of our rare nights out, at the pub at Devil’s Dyke.  One was an outing with the kids to Bramber Castle, and another to an outing at Arundel Castle.  Another was in the chapel at Lancing College.  I snapped a picture of Paula in the midst of casting her ball when we took the kids bowling.

2010-11-19 Paula - 02 - Our Night Out 2010-11-12 Dining at Aberdeen - 01 - Paula 2010-12-25 Family Christmas - 14 2010-12-25 Family Christmas - 24 Brighton Gay Pride - Paula Terry and Paula at Abbey Road

2010-10-31 Trip to Wales - 21 - Terry and Paula 2010-10-31 Trip to Wales - 22 - Terry and Paula 2010-11-14 Paula - 02 2010-11-14 Paula - 03  2010-12-25 Paula Christmas - 01  2010-12-25 Paula Christmas - 04 2010-12-27 Paula Painting Bedroom - 01 2010-12-27 Paula Painting Bedroom - 04 2010-12-27 Paula Painting Bedroom - 05 Image9 Image13 Image37 IMG_0840 IMG_0841 IMG_0847 IMG_0853 IMG_0858 IMG_0867 IMG_0893 IMG_0973 IMG_0980 IMG_1031 IMG_1061 IMG_1062 2010-11-13 Bowling Day - 05 - Paula 2010-12-27 Painting Bedroom - 01 2010-12-27 Paula Painting Bedroom - 06 Brighton Gay Pride 01 IMG_0681 IMG_0705 IMG_0836 IMG_0871 IMG_1038 IMG_1068

This is just a small sampling of hundreds of photos, videos, emails, and all manner of stuff.  This was a real marriage to me, and I sacrificed a lot despite the odds and despite everything she did, to make it happen and to make it last.  It’s just a shame it didn’t mean anything to her.


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About DogDharma

Dog Dharma is written by a human who loves dogs and who believes dogs have attained enlightenment. The human behind Dog Dharma came from humble origins, has faced many trials, enjoyed many adventures, and taken a path less traveled. He claims no special privilege or expertise, and remains humble. Dog Dharma‘s author has learned a few things along the way, and has much yet to learn. He has been told by many people that he has a talent for writing, and aspires to write a book, but is a little too lazy and disorganized, so his blog will suffice for now. He opens a window into his life in the hope that some of his words may be of comfort, some may be a beacon or warning, and perhaps he will connect with like-minded souls. Everything shared comes from a place of openness and honesty, but with no claim that he possesses the Truth. People and places mentioned should be taken as pseudonyms. In many cases, details may be an amalgamation of actual events disguised to protect the “innocent.” Nothing written is to be taken as actual fact, but as the author of Dharma Dog‘s limited understanding. From the mouths of the Beatles: In the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make
This entry was posted in cheater, cheating, Claire Marshall, infidelity, liar, lying, marriage, Paula Khier, Paula Simmons, Paula Vanzetti, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Marriage — A Retropective in Pictures

  1. I have been browsing online more than 3 hours today, yet I never found any
    interesting article like yours. It is pretty worth enough for
    me. Personally, if all web owners and bloggers made good content as you did,
    the net will be a lot more useful than ever before.

    Liked by 1 person

    • DogDharma says:

      Thank you, Hermes. A great compliment I will take to heart. I have poured everything into what I have shared which hasn’t been an easy process. If it has enlightened or entertained or uplifted or warned even one person, then I am grateful.


  2. So sad seeing the pic, you have given up so much and for her it’s just a sick game. x

    Liked by 1 person

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